What do we feed ourselves every day?

What do we feed ourselves every day?

The invisible conversation between our thoughts, hormones and body

Imagine waking up in the morning and, before you have even got out of bed, your head is already full of thoughts. Will I get everything done today? Why did I say that yesterday? What do other people think of me? What if I’m not good enough?

You haven’t done anything yet, but you already feel a slight tension. Your shoulders tighten, your breathing becomes shallower and somewhere in your stomach there is a familiar restlessness.

On the outside, nothing seems to have happened. And yet your body has already reacted.

We tend to think that our thoughts live in our head and our feelings in our heart, as if the body were something separate that simply carries us through the day. In reality, there is a constant conversation going on inside us. The brain, the nervous system and our hormones communicate with each other all the time, and our physical and emotional experiences are far more closely connected than we notice in everyday life.

A tiny gland, about the size of a pea, at the base of the brain also plays its part in this conversation. It is called the pituitary gland.

A small gland with a big impact

The pituitary gland is one of those parts of the body we probably don’t think about very often. Yet this small gland helps regulate many processes that are essential to our body.

Through hormones, the pituitary gland helps control growth, metabolism, reproduction and the body’s response to stress, among other things. It doesn’t work alone, but in close cooperation with the hypothalamus – an area of the brain that helps link the nervous system with hormonal regulation.

When we experience something threatening or stressful, the body starts preparing for it. Part of this process takes place through the cooperation of the hypothalamus, the pituitary gland and the adrenal glands. As a result, the production of the stress hormone cortisol increases, which helps the body cope in a difficult situation.

This is completely natural and necessary. Our body is designed to respond to situations that require attention, energy and action.

But what happens when the stressful situation never ends? When, instead of an external threat, our inner alarm bells keep sending messages that we are not good enough, that something might go wrong, or that we always have to try harder?

What recipe do we prepare for ourselves every day?

If our everyday thoughts were ingredients, what kind of dish would we mix together?

Maybe in the morning we add a pinch of doubt. Then a couple of spoonfuls of comparing ourselves to others. During the day we sprinkle in some fear of making mistakes, and in the evening we season it all with self-criticism.

Sound familiar?

Sometimes we are our own harshest critics. We notice what we didn’t get done more easily than what we did well. We compare our lives to others’, doubt our decisions and set ourselves expectations that feel almost impossible to meet.

Often we no longer even notice these thoughts. They have become so habitual that they feel like part of who we are.

But our body may not distinguish between tension that comes from a difficult situation around us and tension that comes from how we interpret that situation. In both cases, a stress response may be triggered.

This doesn’t mean that every negative thought causes a hormonal imbalance. Nor are all physical complaints linked to our thoughts. What we do know, however, is that chronic stress can affect sleep, energy levels, concentration and overall wellbeing.

This can create a kind of cycle: we feel tired, become more critical of ourselves, worry more, and this in turn can make it harder to rest and recover.

Sometimes we no longer even notice when this cycle began.

The body speaks even when we don’t listen

Have you ever noticed that with some people you feel relaxed and at ease, while in someone else’s company your shoulders tense up or you get an uncomfortable feeling in your stomach?

Or that before an important conversation your heart starts beating faster, even though you know rationally that there is no real danger?

Our body is constantly reacting to what we experience. Sometimes we notice these reactions right away, other times only once the tension has been building for a while.

Physical sensations don’t always give us clear answers. Tense shoulders don’t necessarily mean suppressed anger, and a stomach ache isn’t necessarily linked to anxiety. But they can be signals that invite us to pause for a moment and notice how we feel.

A holistic approach invites us to look at a person as a whole – not only their thoughts, feelings or physical body separately, but how these are connected to one another.

When we have felt exhausted for a long time, the question may not only be how to rest more. It may also be worth exploring what expectations we carry with us, how much we allow ourselves, and how we relate to our own needs.

Sometimes the body is the first to let us know that something needs attention.

Can we change our inner recipe?

We can’t always choose which thoughts or feelings arise in us. Sometimes fear appears completely unexpectedly. Sometimes we catch ourselves comparing ourselves to others again, even though we had decided not to.

And sometimes the self-critical voice is so familiar that we can’t even imagine what it would be like without it.

But perhaps we don’t have to change all our thoughts or get rid of uncomfortable feelings.

Perhaps we can simply start by noticing.

For example, the next time you catch yourself thinking “I can’t handle this”, you can pause for a moment. Not to talk yourself out of it straight away, but to explore what is happening inside you in that moment.

What am I feeling right now?
Is there tension anywhere in my body?
What do I need in this situation?
Would I speak like this to someone I truly care about?

This kind of attention may not change how we feel right away. But it can create a small space between an automatic thought and the reaction that follows.

And it is in that small space that the possibility to respond differently can arise.

Holistic therapy offers an opportunity to explore these connections calmly and at a pace that feels right for you. In therapy, we can look together for ways that help you better notice your thoughts, feelings and bodily sensations, and understand how they are intertwined in your everyday life.

Therapy doesn’t mean that we always have to turn our thoughts positive or get rid of uncomfortable feelings. Rather, it is an opportunity to get to know yourself better, understand your needs and build a more supportive relationship with yourself.

Because sometimes what we need is not a new way to change ourselves, but a chance to truly listen to ourselves.